The Vanishing Mediator

Having fun on the internet.

Lumberknight: The Francophone Protocol

A play by Chris/0

Information You May Wish To Know

This is a play I wrote for the 28th WPI New Voices theatre festival. WPI is my alma mater, and I am very proud that this play was selected for the festival. (Update: I am yet prouder that this play was featured in the Hindsight theatre festival as one of the the best plays ever performed in the 30-year history of New Voices.) I have decided to make the script available under a license that allows redistribution, free performances, and paid performances without seeking the permission of the copyright holder. Who, in this case, is me. All I ask in return is that you don’t change it (because I like how it turned out) and that you tell people that I wrote it (specific attribution requirements are spelled out in the document itself).

Lumberknight: The Francophone Protocol tells the story of Canada’s greatest superhero – Lumberknight – and his adventure while attempting to rescue the Prime Minister’s daughter, who has been kidnapped by canadian separatists… the Quebecois! It features many true facts about Canada which are exactly as true as they are made up. I am forever indebted to John Hodgman for the “invented fact” style of humor exhibited in the play.

Here Is the Script That I Have Mentioned

Lumberknight: The Francophone Protocol, written by Christopher Osborn

© 2010 Christopher Osborn

Creative Commons by-ndCreative Commons plusCreative Commons network

Perhaps These Numbers Will Be Useful to You

The run time for this script is 25–30 minutes. There are 11 roles with lines, one chorus, and as many extras as you can fit, I suppose. Role-by-role line breakdowns are included in the dramatis personæ of the script itself. Two roles are probably male-only, one probably female-only, and the rest are interchangeable. The chorus sings one theme song.

Further Permissions

Permissions beyond those of the Creative Commons license may be requested. Do feel free to change gender references, minor set elements, &c. to fit your actors or staging. If you do feel the need to e-mail me – for permissions or for anything, really – please do so. I would love to know that my work is being performed.