You may recall that a while back, I wrote a Machine of Death story as part of the initial run of Easily-Distracted Tales. You may further recall that I recorded a performance of this story to be submitted to the Machine of Death talent show.
Though that performance did not make it into the show, I must have done something right. I was asked if I had interest in reading one of the stories from the book for the Machine of Death audiobook-in-parts podcast. Of course I said yes. So I sat down in a small, questionably sturdy box composed of eggcrate-textured mattress toppers and alternately growled and whined into a USB microphone until I had a performance I wouldn’t be embarrassed sharing with the likes of Ryan North, Matthew Bennardo, and David Malki !
Then, when GarageBand inexplicably lost large chunks of that performance, I did it again.
The result is what you may hear in the link above. A real story, from the real Machine of Death, written by Bartholomew von Klick, and read by me.
I am so happy, I could just burst.
A helpful note: If you have arrived here from the Machine of Death site, clicking the link above will take you back there. And clicking the link there to here will take you back here again. It is possible that you will click back and forth between the two sites forever, following the circle over and over. Consuming all of your time and energy, eventually consuming all of the resources of the internet, the world, and the entire universe. The acceleration of entropy will cascade throughout the cosmos, converting everything into useless, roughly 2.275 K cosmic microwave background radiation.
I encourage you to do that in the strongest possible terms, as it sounds pretty entertaining.